The following was forwarded to me via e-mail. I don’t know the person (Roger S.) who first penned it, but it’s just wonderful.
Imagine the joy of sending this “Holiday” Greeting to every PC store that refuses to use the word “Christmas.” Imagine their customer service inboxes overloaded with this timely and “meaningful” greeting.
Copy and Past the following:
“Please accept with no obligation, implied or implicit, my best wishes for an environmentally conscious, socially responsible, low-stress, non-addictive, gender-neutral celebration of the winter solstice holiday, practiced within the most enjoyable traditions of the religious persuasion of your choice, or secular practices of your choice, with respect for the religious/secular persuasion and/or traditions of others, or their choice not to practice religious or secular traditions at all. I also wish you a fiscally successful, personally fulfilling and medically uncomplicated recognition of the onset of the generally accepted calendar year 2008, but not without due respect for the calendars of choice of other cultures whose contributions to society have helped make America great. Not to imply that America is necessarily greater than any other country nor the only America in the Western Hemisphere. Also, this wish is made without regard to the race, creed, color, age, physical ability, religious faith or sexual preference of the wishee.”
I’d add the following PS:
PS: May all of your “Holiday’ trees drop their needles!
Now just in case you think such an exercise is pointless, read about the unfortunate case of Patty Lewis, Human Resources Director in Diversifying Christmas from Ft. Hard Knox.
Just in case you want to spread the “Holiday” joy, here are a few places to start:
Christmas Unfriendly “Scrooge” Stores Contact Links:
Bed. Bath, and Beyond
K-Mart Customer Service form, or email@example.com, or firstname.lastname@example.org
Sears Customer Relations. For an earlier story on how Sears responded last week to inquiries about their “Holiday” trees read Give Sears and K-Mart a Holiday They Won’t Soon Forget
Ok now that we’ve had our fun it back to whining and complaining.